You know me...travel stories, SCA event evals,sentiment and family...nothing new here.

Yesterday I came home to Katie approaching me wound tight and rigid with her arms crossed, jaw clamped and face flushed. "Wow," I said to myself, "This has got to beat anything else in my life, hands down."

"I failed my rhetoric test," she said (her first college credit test-11th grade). I said, "Okay, are you angry about how it was graded?" Tears sprang into her eyes and her jaw gripped harder. "No, I am disappointed in myself." I opened my arms and there she was, crying and me wondering how to bring balance back between accountability and tremendous pressure.

She said her teacher would probably be calling cause she "had some kind of mental breakdown in class...Mom, I cried and I told her I had no idea why."

We talked and it came out that she had not provided sufficient citations for each point. Basically, she was right she just did not copy enough passages from the provided article to fully support her thoughts. Yep, I would have been frustrated too. In the end we learned she can retake the test and get extra points up to the lowest grade on the first test. Her average, now a C could go back up to a B.

Part of me wondered if putting her in the AP was too much pressure. 1/2 the class has gone back to honors level classes. Are we hurting her or encouraging her to excel?

The thing that struck me most was that her personal accountability comes from both of us. The internalizing of pressure is her dad....the tears of frustration, 100% me. She is normally so like her daddy. It scared her to have her emotional side show up so unexpectedly.

Les and I agreed it must be a recessive Momma gene. The three of us smiled that she did have a touch of me in her that none of us knew....even if its discovery felt like a meltdown.

Parenting is one huge moment after another, intersperced with day to day acts. She is so passionate but usually so controlled and compartmentalized. Now she knows that sometimes, the walls come down unexpectedly. Maybe its estrogen or rearing but feelings can well up and well over. Sometimes, all of a sudden it feels like too much. Those are the times we need others. Those are the times I am glad they can still come to their Mom and Dad.

So much to help her and Chris learn about themselves, the world and how they live in it.

So much hope that their lives will be easier than ours.

So few years left before they are out and gone.

Wow.